


Jesters

by nigoi



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: And Therefore Is Not To Be Made Responsible For The Quality Of The Piece, Gen, Pranks and Practical Jokes, The Author Wrote This Using A Fast-Writing App
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-03-02 05:57:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18805120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nigoi/pseuds/nigoi
Summary: Grunkle Stan and Mabel pull the exact same prank on Dipper on two different occasions.





	Jesters

**Author's Note:**

  * For [P----](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=P----).



> i wrote this using the figther's block app, so. enjoy!
> 
> this, as always, is for P----! <3

"Grunkle Ford," Dipper says, with a manic, mildly panicked expression, "you won't believe what I found!"

Stanford Totally Not Stanley Pines fixes the neck of his shirt. "What occurred, my dear nephew Dipper?" Totally Stanford stifles a snicker. "Did someone, uh, steal a diamond out of a tree or something?"

"No! Worse than that! He—AH! YOUR HAND!" Dipper points at the... five-fingered hand of Stan. Whoops. Stan covers it, swearing internally, but Dipper screams again. A window breaks. "AAH! Your other hand! What happened, Grunkle Ford?!"

Stan fixes his tie in response.  _ Okay, Stan. Okay. You can still fix this. Take a deep breath and _ —

Dipper interrupts him before he can finish digging his grave. "Did a radioactive bear come down the mountain and ate it? They're quite abundant this time of the year. Or was it your new teletransportdimension machine? Or, oh no! I know!" His speech is starting to accelerate more and more, but it's still understandable. Stan can only watch in awe. "It was Rogers, wasn't it? He came here and stole your finger when you were sleeping even though I told him literally and _ textually _ not to do it! That little being is grounded for life!" He spits that last word and throws his cap to the floor, and his furious expression morphs into a sad one. "I'm sorry. It was all my fault..."

Stan kneels, thankful to all gods out there that Dipper is so,  _ so _ good at making up other's excuses. "Don't worry, Dipper. The truth is—"

The door slams open and what comes out is a low, guttural growl: "STANLEY. PINES."

Stanford, gagged, semi-naked, and with a robe hanging out of his shoulder, stomps towards them fuming like a steam train. "Do you have any explanation for this?" 

Dipper looks frantically between them, mouth hanging open.  "You— Him— I..." He turns to where Stan was. "Grunkle Stan?" But there's nothing but a cloud of dust there.

 

Stanley Pines is not the only one to think about that joke. As one would say, the apple does not fall away from the tree.

 

"Teeheehee!" Mabel covers her laughing mouth with a freckled hand and pushes up her glasses. "I'm so clever!"

"What did you say, Grunkle Ford?" Dipper looks up from the hole in the ancient wall.

"Oh no no no!" Mabel sways a hand around as she says it. "It's nothing!"

Dipper raises an eyebrow, distrustful after the last time but not enough to say it out loud. "If you say so." Then, his eyes land on a drawing behind Mabel, his finger not far behind. "What does that circle mean?"

Mabel doesn't even hesitate. "It means rainbow!"

"Rainbow?"

"Yep!"

"...O-kay." He says it slowly, but doesn't call her lie out. He points to another thing, a drawing full of corpses lain around a flower. "And that?"

"Rainbow kittens!"

"And that?"

"A fart of rainbows!" she says, awed. A rainbow materialises behind her.

"...Is there anything that doesn't mean rainbow?" 

"Yes!" Mabel turns around one, two, three times. Her fez falls off her head. "That!" She points to a rainbow. "It symbolizes the ritual of Ghutni, a monster that takes the appearance of a flower to lure its unsuspecting victims in. The old folks in Gravity Falls designed a ritual so that it ate someone that was not them. They kidnapped the tourists that came to the town, killed them, and fed them to the Ghutni, usually in a circle pattern." She takes a breath. "And that's why Gravity Falls is not in any maps, yay!"

Dipper's eyes are really open. You know another thing he opens? His mouth. But before he can say something, the door slams open. The ancient walls tremble. Grunkle Stan appears, scowling.

"If I can't do that prank, you can't either, Mabel!" 

Mabel pouts. "Aw, not fair, Grunkle Stan..." she mutters. It seems that Dipper didn't hear it, though, because he asks, 

"What! Is that true?"

Mabel, who grasps the slimy opportunity, makes a hand gesture. "Psssshh, nah."

"Oh, okay."

Grunkle Stan growls.


End file.
